You're the average of the five people you spend the most time with

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with” – Jim Rohn

It’s a quote I see and hear increasingly often across social media, podcasts and books.

I first came across it about 10 years ago.

It got me thinking.

Who am I closest to?

Who am I spending the most time with?

How are they impacting me and my energy to achieve what I’d like to achieve in life?

What needs to change?

In your quest to become the best player you can be, have you considered your environment?

There’s a great quote from American psychiatrist Daniel G. Amen:

“Who are the five people you spend the most time with? Which category do they fit into?

“If the world around you is negative, chances are you are too. On the other hand, if you surround yourself with positive, uplifting people, you’ll notice an almost immediate rise in your spirits.

“Don’t forget, you can choose the people with whom you spend your time.”

So, I put the question to you: across the six areas below, are you being positively influenced?

1. Who do you live with? Parents, siblings, house mates?

2. Who do you play/train with? Teammates, training partners?

3. Your other half?

4. School/university/work colleagues?

5. Friends?

6. Social media, YouTube, music, TV, newspapers, articles?

Are the people you’re mixing with aligned with your own values and goals?

How do you feel when you’re with each of these people?

These are all questions that deserve your time and consideration if you want to get the most out of yourself.

Your living situation is a difficult one. If you’re still at home with your parents and siblings, there’s probably a good reason for it; you’re still at school, studying or not quite ready to move out yet.

However, the question still stands. What impact does your home life have on you? Does it provide you with what you need right now?

If you’re flatting with others, are they like-minded individuals? If not, what power do you have to change that? Do they respect your space and needs? Maybe because they’re different to you, they give you space from cricket to get away from the game, which is also important for your general well-being.

Is your current team giving you the opportunities you need to progress? If you’re not batting where you’d like to, are there other benefits to being in the team e.g. learning from senior players, good training facilities or environment?

Who is your training partner? Are they reliable? Do they push you to get better? Do they have a good strong and accurate throwing arm when the bowling machine is not available?

Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend? Are they supportive of your goals and long-term dreams? How does their personality complement yours? Do they make you feel good about yourself?

What about the people you mix with at school, university or work? Are they interesting or fun? Can you have a good conversation about meaningful topics?

Why are you friends with the people you’re friends with?

Finally, social media… what impact is the stuff you’re consuming on a daily basis having on you and your opinions? How is it impacting your energy? Are you taking information, education and entertainment from sources that is benefitting you?

This is one of the biggest benefits of living in this age.

We have access to all of recorded history at the tap of a few buttons and we can curate our social media feed in a way that allows us to absorb the key messages that will help drive us towards our goals.

There’s one thing we haven’t discussed yet.

You and how you’re impacting all these aspects of your life.

What are you giving back?

Are you supportive and interesting and informative?

Do you listen when the other person needs you to listen?

Can you be present for them?

Are you treating others in the way you’d like to be treated?

So many questions.

Many of which I hope you have some answers for.

Because, don’t forget.

We only have a short window in which to impact the world.

The minutes add up to hours, and hours quickly become days.

Is it time you started asking yourself these difficult questions?

If you’re not where you’d like to be in life, then maybe it is.